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Thanksgiving, Continued

Dec
2
2005

Here we are, about a week past Thanksgiving and if your family is like mine you’re just starting to see the bottom of the Tupperware containers.
The equation that gets passed down in my family for calculating how big a turkey you need is to take the number of guests multiplied by the amount in a serving, and then quadruple it so you have enough leftovers. If there’s not enough turkey left for several rounds of sandwiches then Thanksgiving is considered a cheat. There are also other secret formulas to make sure the mashed potatoes and stuffing and such last until New Year’s, but I don’t suppose I’ll get those until I become a grownup and take on Thanksgiving chef duties.
Here’s a song in honor of the way Thanksgiving goes in my family, and perhaps yours.
On the first day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the second day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the third day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the fourth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the fifth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the sixth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the seventh day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the eighth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Eight moldy jello molds,
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the ninth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Nine browning green bean casseroles,
Eight moldy jello molds,
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the tenth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Ten greenish mashed yams,
Nine browning green bean casseroles,
Eight moldy jello molds,
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the eleventh day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Eleven cups of stinky stuffing,
Ten greenish mashed yams,
Nine browning green bean casseroles,
Eight moldy jello molds,
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.
On the twelfth day of leftovers, my mother sent to me
Twelve (?) fossilized turkey carcasses,
Eleven cups of stinky stuffing,
Ten greenish mashed yams,
Nine browning green bean casseroles,
Eight moldy jello molds,
Seven pints of graying gravy,
Six pounds of dry mashed potatoes,
Five (?) turkey wings,
Four dozen stale rolls,
Three (?) roasted drumsticks,
Two half-eaten pies,
And just a few pounds, dear, of multiplying leftover turkey.

Share  Posted by Deborah Klosky at 8:53 AM | Permalink

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